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11.08.2007

Room With a View

So of course whilst sitting in the breakroom eating lunch, a kid comes and sits at the table across from me with his back to me. When he sits down, the shirt comes up and the pants go down and all you can see for miles is crack. my appetite.....gonzo!

Also this wiry man that sits a cubicle down from me and across the aisle always sits with his skinny leg propped up on his desk...today while he was napping (as he usually does) he farted.
.....................and Thank YOU for that! no shame.

So this lady that I have to do correspondence with quite frequently for work, prefers to go by CJ rather than Carol as her name is listed in all of our work programs. And don't worry-she isn't shy about letting you know what she wants you to call her. When we first started working here, one of my coworkers emailed her and -heaven forbid- unkowingly called her Carol. Her reply email didn't even address the question he had asked, it simply said. "It's CJ, not Carol." Well "Ceej" has thrice called me Andre in emails she has sent me. It's driving me crazay!!! Next time I am going to email her back and say: "CAROL! It's AndreA not Andre."

it might not go over so well.

i hope SOMEONE is having a good laugh

The vending machine at work:
-Accepts $1 and $5
-Charges $1 for Dr Pepper

I took my $5 and purchased my $1 Dr Pepper. I always worry when I pay with a 5 that I won't get my change back. But don't worry about today, it gave me my four dollars in change back................IN DIMES!!! That's right. FOURTY DIMES! I was like freakin Hansel and Gretel walking back to my desk dropping my dimes all over. I had to bend down every few steps and pick another one up. One old man stopped to help and stuff ended up falling out of his shirt pocket when he bent over, so it really caused more confusion than help- so I told him to keep the dime for his troubles. fourty dimes seriously? what happend to the silver dollar coins that USED to be in there? honestly.

11.07.2007

kill the headlights and put it in neutral

so im really really tired, so how about we keep this short. I got pizza from Papa Murphys tonight. I'm kind of paranoid about germs alot. I try to not worry about it too much, or I begin to get freaky OCD tendencies- like when I would only eat off certain plates, and bowls, and with certain silverware at MY OWN HOUSE for years. that was wierd of me. So anyway...back to Papa Murphys. I saw the little 16 yr old boys that jointly made my pizza wash their hands before they started making it... But I couldn't help be freaky. While the taller boy took 3 years to spread on the pizza sauce the short boy fondled my pepperonis. I had a hard time with this. What if he holds them too long in his bare hands and his hands start sweating. What if he didn't wash good enough, and I get his hand germs. What if he has fungus under his nails and it drops onto my pepperoni. i just gagged. i know other places i've eaten are grosser and have grosser people so i shouldnt worry about 2 kids and their at LEAST somewhat clean hands... it could be worse. but still- thats what went thru my head, and I thought i'd share.

my apologies

I didn't even think about putting that video of the relief society nightmare on here last night. You may be mad now...but when you see the cutest everness quilt I was working on instead...you will quickly forgive me and feel guilty that you were previously upset with me.

11.06.2007

FOR shame!

So a girl that Brad works with showed him a 10 second video she had recorded on her phone during Relief Society this past Sunday. She was like, Brad you have to see what we did in RS- you will DIE. They sang 3 hymns at the beginning of Relief Society and for all 3 songs they changed the words and sang the phrase "I am Awesome" over and over. Because "sometimes sisters are too hard on themselves and they need to realize they are awesome" The one she had recorded was to the tune of Battle Hymn of the Republic. I died. You can see the lady up front leading the music and everything.

Can you believe the sickness!!?!?! Who thought of that?! Who goes ALONG with that!!!? THREE SONGS with all the words changed to I AM AWESOME?!?!? see...this is exactly the reason why missionaries worry about bringing investigators and new members to church.

When i get home tonight- i'll see if i can get the video uploaded so you can all gag.

11.05.2007

Sorry to steal off of everyones blogs...but some things are too good. I can't help myself.

Hope noone had this problem on Halloween



AN ABSOLUTE MUST SEE!!!!

To see theeeee best and/or sickest Halloween costume ever known to mankind....Please click here to go to my sister-in-laws blog. Just a warning...you WILL die.

Am I back in 1994 again or something??

I heard Ace of Base 'All that she wants' 4 times this weekend.

But with lyrics like ...she's the hunter you're the fox... I really can't complain now can I?


We bought Guitar Hero 3 this weeekend. It's pretty sweet. You all HAVE to come over and play.

Be there....or be square.



a special thanks to the JD and Lara for coming and rocking out and helping us unlock all the songs.

The purse from hell.....

man oh man oh man oh man....no wonder why i can never find anything in my purse. I cleaned it out today and here is what I found:

Fabric
Silly Putty
4 bottles of medicine
scissors
brush
badge from my old job
keys
2 pairs of earrings
a thimble
tons of mail/bills
MY TWEEZERS THAT I THOUGHT I LOST!
a movie
4 pkgs of gum
bean bag
pregnancy test
3 spools of thread
my wallet
lotion
2 bottles of eye drops
fingernail polish
13 pens/markers
2 pkgs of quilting needles
5 chapsticks/lip gloss
26 gum wrappers
13 loose receipts
ipod and headphones
spare key to my car
a pudding snack pack
a shoe

Is everyone elses purses that bad??? please tell me they are. what a disaster my life is.

PS there really wasnt a shoe in my purse. but im kind of surprised there wasnt!!

11.02.2007

it's friday, im in love

So this is probably a "you had to be there" story. But I think its funny. Oh that's probably because i WAS there. hmm.

As ridiculous as this is- Brad and I have gotten into quite a few tiffs on Friday night about where we are going to eat. He always suggests Mimis, Smokehouse, Italian Place, Pizza Factory, or Cracker Barrel - and I always want PF Changs, Red Lobster, Olive Garden, Magelbys Fresh or Outback. So tonight I said - okay you think of 3 places you want to eat and I'll think of 3 and then we'll compare our lists and see if we have any the same and we'll go there. Thank heaven we both had written China Lilly down as to not waste our night with this crap - "how bout here" "oh sick, no way" "you cant be serious" "how bout here" "no that sounds gross". So we went to China Lilly - its a decent Chinese place (but doesn't have the Great Wall of Chocolate like PF Changs :)) and the hostess showed us to our table, and when Brad sat down, his chair totally made this noise that sounded like he farted. It was soo funny. The hostess was trying not to laugh but couldn't help it and I of course was laughing. Brad was trying to play it off but c'mon - even though he really didnt do it, its still a little embarrassing.

Ah the joys of Friday night.

TGIF

Whoever said "theres no such thing as a dumb question" is a liar

I went to Subway today for lunch. I got the same thing I always get...a 6 inch Roasted Chicken Breast. The chicken is frozen and then put in the little bins and kept cool, so it mostly thaws but is still super cold and usually frozen in the middle still...so they have to heat it up in the microwave. Well the guy asks if I want my sandwich toasted and I said no and he said "Oh, Do you still want the meat warmed up though?" ....................................... I was speechless. I gave him a blank stare and blinked a few times before I could respond "Ummmm yeeeeah. that would be great". I don't usually eat my chicken partially frozen, but maybe that's just a personal preference.

That was a dumb question.

These are the moments we cherish

In the past couple of days I have had some awkward moments, and I would like to share.

Awkward Moment 1. The scenario: Team Meeting, 20 people PACKED in a very small room, the boss has brought homemade cookies to share and they are being passed around the room.

So I hear everyone start eating their cookies and saying how delicious they are and so I decide that I would love to have one too - and I hope that the wierd old man that steals paper from the copy room allllll thheeee timmme didn't eat my share of cookies when he took..literally FOUR cookies when the bag passed him by. Luckily, there's plenty to go around. So when I first bit into my cookie the taste was amazing...this really WAS a tasty chocolate chip cookie and all those people werent just saying it to suck up to the boss that was standing right behind me. But then I noticed that I couldn't actually chew through the cookie. There was something in there I couldn't bite thru..like paper or something. I felt so stuck- how was I going to spit out this "cookie" in my mouth without my boss seeing me do it. So I turned a little to the side so he couldn't see what I was doing and very conspicuously took it out. Then I noticed INSIDE the uneaten portion of my cookie there was more of this paper sticking out. It was totally baked inside - and it was NOT supposed to be there. I had to pull on that paper SO hard to get it out of my cookie. There was no message on the paper....no fortune....so I just trashed it when the boss walked out a couple mins later. You know I don't know if like some of the page from the recipe book got put in my cookie- a paper towel - I don't know what it was!!!! But it kind of had the thickness that those little cupcake paper liner things have. Wierd huh. And this was like a square inch if not bigger piece of paper. Anyway- it was awkward trying to deal with the situation without letting anyone else notice that there is paper baked into my cookie- cuz I think that would have been embarrassing to my boss that brought them. So anyway.....

Awkward moment #2.
So I went to Blockbuster last night to rent a movie- cuz thats what you do at blockbuster. So Thursday nights must be pretty slow at Blockbuster cuz there was maybe like 2 of us in the store and when I went to check out, I was the only one in line. Very convenient. So the two people working are a gangly boy, and a girl, that appeared normal, but I sensed she was a little trashy. Like one of those people that would have teeth missing and talk kind of uneducated. Anyway- that's a really rude judgment, but it is what it is. And no offense to movie store workers, but they all seem a little different to me. Like way into I dont know..Star Wars or dungeons and dragons stuff or something. I don't know..again...passing very harsh judgment. So I'm standing in line, the girl is ringing me up, and I can hear the gangly boy talking to her about something but I'm too into my own thoughts to pay attention. When I looked up a moment later I made eye contact with the gangler, we'll call him, and I smiled and so I think he thought I was listening to their conversation and that my smile was a smile of agreement to what he was saying- so he keeps going. And now instead of talking to only his coworker, he's now totally talking to me too....I still have no idea what he's talking about. Something about "old ladies that listen to that band think theyre hip..dont ya think?" I can totally tell he's trying to be funny so I give a courtesy laugh...totally not knowing what's going on. So my laugh eggs him on. "its because of all the rock n roll they listened to in the 70's" Again I laugh, cuz I can tell that's what he's looking for. FINALLY I've paid for the movie, so I start walking out, and he keeps going and so I say "oh thats funny" as I walk out the door. I walked out and was like WHAT JUST HAPPENED? I still have no idea what he was talking about- it was just awkward. I guess I didn't KNOW i was SUPPOSED to be listening to his 'hysterical' assessment of old ladies (and I figure old meaning 45-50) thinking theyre hip because of some band they listen too. I dont know.. blah blah blah... still dont know.

WANTED: Middle-aged black man with sass. Big butt... Bigger heart...

11.01.2007

Dilemma

It is now 5:53 am. I need to wake up in 2 hrs. Do I just stay awake?? Or do I go to sleep for the 2 hrs? Since all of you are actually asleep...i'll have to decide on my own. (why is my time stamp off by an hour? I'll have to look into changing that.

interesting

You know what's funny. I was just looking at how many posts I've written over the course of my blog. In the month of October I did 1 less post than I did in my first year and 2 months of having this blog. In case any of you are dumb and didn't get that.... From July 06- Sept o7 I did 29 posts. In October 07 I did 28 posts.

I really did not like or get the point of blogging for a long time. And now I can't get enough of it!!! I love going to a blog I know, clicking on one of their links, clicking on one of theirs, and so on and so forth until I find one I love. I have found some amazingly hilarious blogs this way - I love it! And I've found so many people I know by doing that. Blogs are the glue that holds this world together.

So I have been tagged by my friend Kaela- this is my first time being tagged - so this is very exciting! I'm supposed to tell 7 Random Things about Me - but I can't stop at 7. So I'll go on until I run out of things. (dont feel obligated to read them all. No, on second thought, do feel obligated - READ THEM ALL DANG IT!!!)

1. I have Polycystic Ovary Syndrome and the medicine I have to take for it makes me sick! Bah!
2. I love love love MLB. I love watching it more than any other professional sport on TV.
3. But I LOVE going to college football games. That is my favorite sport to watch in person.
4. I know way more about sports than my husband.
5. I wish I would have done cooler things and visited cool places before I got married
6. I wish I would have been better with my money before I got married and would have built up a good savings.
7. I tend to think people are getting increasingly creepy as the years roll by.
8. And I think that Halloween just gives the creeps the chance to dress up like the true freaks they are! ha. so as fun as halloween is, it scares me.
9. Speaking of scared- I have become theeeee biggest scaredy cat ever since I've been married. I have a hard time falling asleep at night and multiple times a month I will sit up on my couch the majority (or all) of the night and just read blogs and watch tv so that I don't have to sleep.
And wouldnt ya know- tonight is a perfect example - Here I am at 3:51 am, not asleep. duh.
10. One of my companions and I got the first stages of frost bite on our feet on the mission (where your feet go all white and numb and hard) and now my feet get cold SOOOOO fast and are most always cold. When before my mission I would wear flip flops all winter. grr.
11. I stick my cold feet on Brad's legs at night to get them warm and he hates it! "....but babe..you are soo warm, and my feet are sooo cold!!!"
12. I LOVE people watching. People are SO Hilarious!!!!!
13. I RARELY dare stand up for myself. I don't often speak my mind to people - I'm a pansy.
14. I don't like onions, but I LOVE Red Robins Onion Rings, and things like the Bloomin Onion at Outback, Onion Strings at Famous Dave's , etc. (When I eat onion rings I pull out the onion and eat the crust)
15. I suck at my calling. I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO FOR ENRICHMENT!!! (Im the 2nd counselor in the RS)
16. If I'm having a hard time falling asleep at night and it's NOT because I'm scared, it's because I'm worrying about my brothers.
17. One of my Biggest pet peeves is hearing people chew. Ick- I hate it!!! And someone I sit by at work chews on ice WITH THEIR MOUTH OPEN every day and it drives me craaaaazay!!
18. But of course I'd never say anything like DIDNT YOUR MOTHER TEACH YOU TO CHEW WITH YOUR MOUTH CLOSED! cuz i'm a pansy, and frankly that's just mean. So my poor husband always gets the wrath of me, cuz his jaw somehow clicks when he eats- and I dare say something to him - and so I'm always staring him down and saying...Honestly, stop clicking. (He knows that I'm just insane and that I know he can't help it, so he doesn't pay attention)
19. I'm such a pansy. I always have been. I don't dare doing anything I want to because Im afraid of A. looking stupid or failing (or both!!!) or B. Getting hurt. i.e. I never dared try out for plays or musicals like I wanted or class president like I wanted and I don't dare go sledding, skiing, motorcycle riding, 4 wheeling (on any trail to steep or crazy)...things like that. I don't want to break my neck!!
20. If I call Brad and he doesn't answer, I immediately assume he's dead in a car wreck and I panic and almost puke. I worry about him soooooooooooooooooooo much.
21. I for some reason always get lost in my thoughts and imagine that Brad does get killed in a car wreck, and I have to try to go on without him...sometimes I'm strong and brave and keep my head held high and sometimes I'm such a mess in my daydream that I go insane. I don't know why I do this!! I just end up bawling and getting a cry headache- and it's just not good.
22. Sometimes I picture that I've died and then I picture Brad dating and getting remarried and it makes me so mad!!! Don't you dare love someone else! But at the same time, I want him to be happy. So I have just decided not to die, so that I don't have to see him love someone else.
23. Along the same lines, I sometimes plan my own funeral - I want really pretty flowers, not some random bouquets- but something thougtful, simple and beautiful. And I want really pretty music- lots of it. Nothing too depressing, just beautiful songs.
24. I'm wierd.
25. I've learned how to cross stitch, sew, quilt, and cook since I've been married and I LOVE it! And I never thought I'd even learn, let alone love it.
26. I love Texas Roadhouse, Village Baker, Red Lobster and Magelbys Fresh and PF Changs.
27. I hate Macaroni Grill, McGrath's Fish House, and the regular Magelbys.
28. I make fun of people too much.
29. Since April of 06 I've had 8 jobs.
30. Why did I admit that?!!
31. I got a speeding ticket in July of 01 and didn't pay it until September 04. I had a warrant out for my arrest, and when I went to the courthouse, or wherever it was I went, to find out how much I owed.... the cops immediately came to the desk where I was and said I had to pay it off right then, or go to jail. YOINKS!
32. I am learning sign language- and i LOVE IT!!
33. I got to "interpret" 2 songs on Sunday for Curry and Melissa's kids that are deaf, during their primary program. It was so fun!!
34. 2 months after Brad and I got married I was having really really bad migraines and would wake up in the night and my body would be completely numb. And then one morning we got up at like 8 (we were in St George at his grandparents for Thanksgiving) and my head was killing me and I started throwing up and couldn't stop and I went delirious and don't remember the next 13 hrs of the day, even though I was awake for most of those hours. I apparently wouldn't relax and stay on the couch and wouldn't stop throwing up and was asking where Brad was and he was right by me and so Brad and his dad and grandma took me to the ER and they had to put me in a wheelchair cuz I couldn't walk and I was saying wierd things and creeping Brad out and so they rushed me right back. I was mean to the nurses and had to have all kinds of tests done and be sedated. They never found anything- and just said I went crazy because I couldn't handle the pain anymore. BIZARRE HUH!?!?!?!?!??!! I was sick for days after and had a hard time going back to work cuz I couldn't work as fast after that for a few months.
35. I'm TERRRRRRIFIED of something like that happening again.
36. I love love love to doodle and write my name all over the place.
37. When I was little I wrote my name on our piano, in the window well in my bedroom, on the carpet with lipstick...everywhere.
38. I used to give plasma twice a week for a little extra money.
39. If I could know what I know now and had the chance to go back in time (like to Jr High/High School) and redo things, I would.
40. I love Guitar Hero. I don't play it that often anymore- and I wish I had people to play it with more often.
41. I would rather unload the dishwasher than load it. Brad would rather load it than unload it.
42. I scrub off everything before I put it in the dishwasher. It's probably a waste of time, but I do it anyway.
43. I wish I had a sewing room. I have plans to take over our spare bedroom for that soon, that will have to do for now.
44. I like having my hair blonde better than all one dark color.
45. But my hair is SO dead being all bleached like it is now. *sigh*
46. I get sick to my stomach from going in to Bath and Body Works.
47. If I smell too many candles I get sick to my stomach. Brad is a smell-aholic and could smell candles/lotions/soaps/deodarants all day, and tries to get me to do the same. Doesn't work out too well.
48. I wish I could play the guitar better.
49. I wish I had more opportunities to sing - I'm getting really rusty.
50. I wish I had a piano.
51. I wish I had SPACE for a piano.
52. I taught myself how to play the piano. So I'm not very good.
53. I miss my friends from Ricks that I haven't seen in soo long.
54. I own one brown item of clothing.
55. I haven't owned brown shoes in YEARS!
56. I look better in brown than in black- but all I wear is black.
57. I wish I could be a writer for the show MXC- It's hilarious. Sometimes too crude. But hilarious.
58. I cry easily.
59. My home teacher asked me if I was pregnant a couple of months ago.
60. I almost kicked him in the teeth.
61. I am not pregnant.
62. I'm sorry this list has gotten so long.
63. I could keep going.
64. But I won't.
65. Love ya!!!
66. I think everyone who reads this blog has probably already been tagged- but if you havent- consider yourself tagged. Now let's hear some random things about you.
67. It is now 4:54 am. DUH!!! go to sleep fool!

I can NOT believe it is already November....that makes me want to barf. I'm not sure why- but I have a good guess. Life is flying by at an unbelievable rate!! Does anyone else feel the same??? Another thing I can't believe is that I haven't blogged about our spontaneous California trip we took 2 weekends ago.

Brad and I went to dinner at California Pizza Kitchen Friday the 19th after work and I of course said- dude, we haven't been to California in FOREVVVVVER- let's hurry and pack our bags and go. I say this almost every weekend...and I'm always shut down. But not this time! Brad agreed and 25 mins later we were on the road!!!! We surprised Brad's mom and step dad and little brother Jake. It was SOOO FUN!!! We watched Jake's football game, ate lunch at the Cheesecake Factory in the mall where his Mom works after surprising her at work, and my fave part- We went down to Laguna Beach and walked around and looked at all the cool shops and art studios and then we walked down to the ocean and put our feet in the water and watched the sunset. It was probably the most beautiful sunset I've seen down there and of course we left our camera at my mother-in-laws house!!!!! I was so upset- that's the whole reason I took the camera to CA with us, was to get some ocean pics. duh. Well I sat there and was amazed by how beautiful the sunset and the ocean was, and was also amazed at my dumbness at leaving the camera...and then we went and picked up some food and went back home and ate. Then the next morning we went to breakfast with Brad's dad and then came on home!


Well we actually ended up staying Sunday night in St George because we were stuck in traffic for 3 hrs because of the bad winds and fires. But we made it safely home- kinda wish we would have been stuck in California for a couple extra days, but alas, here we are.

We came home to a beautiful fall day, with no snow on the ground (luckily we missed the snow we got on Saturday here in Utah), but there was a snowman on our lawn that someone made.



Interesting way to make a snowman huh??

Halloweeeeeeeeeeen

So Brad had class and a test Halloween night- so Monday night for FHE we wanted to do something for All Hallows Eve - so I made Hot Dog Mummies for dinner and then we painted pumpkins. From far away the pumpkins look cute- up close you can see all the mistakes I made painting on the black, but that's okay. (We stole the black and white idea from Brad's brothers neighbor- cute idea huh?)