I'm just sitting here wishing I was ambidextrous.

Also- licorice should come in resealable bags because one day they are fresh, soft and yummy. And the next day they have transformed from licorice into red, jaw-breaking, metal rods.

Well I'll BE!

So for lunch today I grabbed a 99 cent Crispy Chicken Sandwich from Wendy's. I wasn't going to get a fry because the last 2 times I've gotten fries from there I've about gagged myself to death. So I thought I'd give them ONE LAST CHANCE to prove themselves before I publicly declared my intense loathing for their fries. And wouldn't ya know!!! They were delicious! It appears that they have started adding some seasoning on them - and it was really quite good!

Now I'm just hoping that that really WAS seasoning and that in fact, some Wendy's worker hadn't just sneezed brown seasoning tasting flecks onto my fries. Well either way - I enjoyed them.

So for the past few work days- I've felt really sick to my stomach around 11/11:30 am and I haven't known why- It's been driving me crazy trying to figure it out! The first day I thought it was the pretzels I'd had for a little snack. So the next day I had some goldfish instead. ('some' meaning alot) (and that in reality probably did add to my sickness)...still sick. So the next day I had a sugar free pudding... still sick. I was feeling like I was in a freaking Nancy Drew novel trying to figure out what was up! And if indeed this was a plot for a Nancy Drew novel, I think the title would have to be "The Mysteriously Mystifying Mystery of the Mysterious Mystery food". But anyway, Today I am triumphant. I have found the culprit. Two words- Marshmallow Mateys. Need I say more. I realized that I started eating these dang things for breakfast the middle of last week when the stomach aches started occurring. I'm still not sure why it took me FOUR days to realize what the source of my misery was, but nonetheless....

Case closed.

Public Restrooms and the reasons I don't like them.

* There are always those cracks on the sides of the doors. STOP LOOKING AT ME!!!!
* Because they are public, so anyone, including the gross fungus people of the world, can use them.
* SOME PEOPLE DON'T KNOW THAT YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO FLUSH!
* The toilet paper is usually thin and rough. Not nice and cushy like the goods at your grandmas.
* I always seem to pick the stall that's out of order and somehow missing the sign on the door alerting you of that.
* You don't know who's been sittin on that seat, so you have to use the seat liner, and then add 2 extra layers of toilet paper.....obsess much??? possibly.
* Those toilet paper holders always seem to be defective. Sometimes when you try to unravel the toilet paper you have to pull so hard it keeps ripping off prematurely and you end up geting one square at a time.
* The soap is made of some fierce flesh eating acid.....STINKY flesh eating acid.
* Air dryers. waste of time.

Things I Don't Understand

- Why people like U2. gag.
- Crocs - the shoes not the animal. (not that i really understand the animal). Maybe if you work in a hospital I'll let them slide..otherwise... NO
- Why Fall only lasts 3 minutes in Utah, when I love it so much!!
- Why Hulk Hogan always wears a fanny pack (those who watch Hogan knows Best...can i get a witness???)
- Why I am turning into my mom and saying things like "Dagnabit" "What in the sam hill" and "for Pete's sake". I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT THOSE MEEEAN!!!!
- How Christina Aguilera has made it in the music industry- she's ugly and sings like a dying hyena...with the head of a meerkat....and the antlers of a caribou.
- What the heck my coworker from Africa is saying (thick accent)
- How I have always lived in snowy places. GET ME OUTTTTTA HERE!!!!!!
- How the lady 2 cubicles down can talk NONSTOP for 8 hrs and still have things to say the next day. (and go figure..she wears Crocs EVERY DAY!!!)
- Why the Indians didn't beat the Red Sox. (well ok, because Josh Beckett is a stallion..but still)
- Why people like cats. They are so gross to me.
- People who chew with their mouth open.

UPDATE!

I watched the minutes tick by...waiting for Subway to call..and at 11:09pm.....they didn't call. So I went to bed, and treated myself to the mysteriously appearing $5.

You know youre a child of the 80's/90's if....

Oh my gosh- I couldn't resist!! I've read this list before but when I saw it on my friend's blog I loved reading it again and just had to put it on my blog too. It brings back so many memories. I could read it over and over.

1. You had a crush on one of the New Kids on the Block members.
2. You wanted to be on StarSearch.
3. You ever uttered the word "Radical!"
4. You wore jelly shoes and jelly bracelets
5. You remember watching shows like "Punky Brewster" , "Webster", and "Double Dare"
6. You can remember what Michael Jackson looked like before his nose fell off.
7. You wore a banana clip in your hair or a slap on wrist band.
8. You rolled up the bottoms of your splatter painted jeans.
9. You wore loafers with everything, and you put the laces in those little rolls.
10. You had slouch socks, and puff painted your own shirt at least once.
11. You knew what Willis was "talkin' 'bout."
12. You know the profound meaning of "Wax on, Wax off."
13. You can remember watching Full House and Saved by the Bell for endless hours!
14. You yearned to be a member of The Babysitters Club, and tried to start a club of your own.
15. You sat on your back porch, playing with your "My Little Pony" , "Rainbow Brite", and "Strawberry Shortcake" dolls
16. You thought Molly Ringwald was REALLY cool.
17. You know what "sike" and "not!" mean
18. You fell victim to 80's fashion : big hair, crimped, combed over to the side, big hoop earrings, and possibly the worst:you wore spandex pants.
19. You wanted to be a Goonie
20. You owned an extensive collection of Cabbage Patch Kids and trolls.
21. You knew "The Artist" when he was humbly called "Prince."22. You actually saw Ted Danson as the MacDaddy he played "Sam" to be.
23. You ever wore flourescent -neon if you will clothing....
24. You could breakdance, or wished you could.
25. You know who He-Man and She-Ra are.
26. You remember MC hammer well.
27. You totally LOVED Barbie's cooler, punkier counterpart, "Jem" and her "Rockers"
28. You wore biker shorts underneath a short skirt and felt stylish.
29. You wore tights under shorts and felt stylish.
30. You layered your multi-colored slouch socks, and added suspenders to make your outfit complete.
31. You had a hypercolor shirt.
32. You thought skorts were the coolest!
33. You had WonderWoman or Superman underwear.
34. You wanted to be The Hulk for Halloween.
35. You believed that "By the power of Greyskull, you HAD the power"
36. Partying "like it's 1999" seemed SO far away!!!!!!!!!!!!!
37. You know that "WHOA" comes from Joey from "Blossom" and that "How Rude!" comes from Stephanie from "Full House"
38. You remember Alf, the little brown alien from Melmac and Vicki the Robot from "MY Little Wonder"
39. You you owned a Skip It.
40. You watched the original Care Bears, My Little Pony, and Ninja Turtles.
41. You know the Macarena by heart.. LOL
42. "Talk to the hand" ... enough said
43. You can finish this [ice ice _ _ _ _ ]
44. You just cant resist finishing this . . ."Iiiiiiin west philidelphia born and raised . . ."
45. You remember: TGIF, Step by Step, Family Matters, Dinosaurs, & Boy Meets World
46. when everyhting was settled by rock paper scissors or bubble gum bubble gum in a dish4
7. You used to listen to the radio all day long just to record your FAVORITE song of ALL time.4
8. Where in the World is Carmen San Diego?" was both a game and a TV game show.
49. You remember when Super Nintendos and Sega Genisis became popular.
50. You always wanted to send in a tape to America's Funniest Home Videos . . . but never taped anything funny.
51. You remember those Where's Waldo books.52. You remember eating Warheads.
53. You remember Ring Pops.
54. Making those little paper fortune cookie things, and then predicting your life with them.
55. You loved the "Land Before Time" movies
56. You haven't always had a computer, and it was cool to have the internet.
57. And Windows 95 was the best.
58. You watched the original cartoons of Rugrats, Power Rangers, and Ninja Turtles.
59. Michael Jordan was a king.
60. YIKES pencils and erasers were the stuff!
61. All your school supplies were "Lisa Frank" brand.
62. Gak was the coolest stuff invented.
63. Lambchop's song never ended.
64. You collected all the Troll dolls
65. If you even know what an original walkman is.
66. You've gotten creeped out by "Are You Afraid of the Dark?"
67. You always said, "Then why don't you marry it!"
68. When you rented VHS tapes, not DVDs.
69. When gas was $0.95 a gallon & Caller ID was a new thing.
70. When we recorded stuff on VCRs.


At a stake dance I won 2 movie tickets in a Macarena competition. I'm the best Macarena-er ever. And yes, I LOVED NKOTB!! I still do. I had a pillow, posters, books I'd ordered from the Book Order at school, tapes, and a hot pink duffle bag. I love them. Also- do you guys remember playing M.A.S.H. I remember it well- because crap! I was still playing it when I was 21. (and thats not a lie) Life's funny- I miss the 80's and 90's alot!

Now that we've established I'm retarded.......

So I met my friend at subway for lunch today, and also picked up some food for another girl I work with that couldn't come cuz she had a meeting. So anyway..I pay for MY food and then hand the girl my subway card and the $5 bill for my friend's food. So she gives me back my subway card and gave me the change. When i went to put the change in my pocket I felt more money in pocket- it was the $5 bill!!!!! WHAT?! So I told the girl, wait you took my 5 right, and she was like yeah, I gave you your change and I was like yeah I know- but I still have a 5. Then- another girl comes up and I tell her the story and she's like, so wait- who would be losing money. And I told her- YOU guys (had she not just listened to my story!!) . So I thought the next thing out of her mouth would be, "Well then that's our mistake." But NO! she said, oh okay- well give me your name and number and then when we cash out at the end of the night if we're missing $5 we'll call you and you can bring it back. YOU HAVE TO BE KIDDING ME RIGHT!!?!!!!!!!!!!!!!!?!!!?!?!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Well who's the dumb crap that actually gives the girl her real phone number.....ME! So pray tell...who's the bigger idiot in this situation? Me or her? Cuz right now, I really don't know. Cuz don't ya know that Im going to get a call at 11 pm when Subway closes tonight asking me to bring them their 5 dollars back.

duh.

double duh.

to each his own

This girl in the bathroom today laid her jacket ON THE GROUND in the stall while she used the bathroom. fungus. I was so grossed out. Has she not LOOKED at the floors in there before??? Or even just seen the sicky people that we have to share the restroom with!!! If my jacket accidentally FELL on the ground in there I would be left with no choice but to burn it to it's sad death, let alone purposely set it on the ground. kaka.

AH-HA!

I knew there was something else I needed to mention. And as I went to leave a comment on a friends blog I remembered abruptly what it was. For those of you who have followed my blog for a time now, will have come across a blog about how I hated when i did a post, the time stamp would say "Posted by Andrea F at 10:33 (or whatever time)" and it looked to me like it said, Posted by Andrea Fat. and it hurt my self esteem. So I changed my name on my blog to Laquisha. Hmm. I guess I could have changed it to just say Andrea..... "posted by Andrea at 10:33".... yep that would have worked. I dont know why I didn't think of that sooner. Well anyway- if you get a comment from Laquisha, before I get around to changing it back to andrea- don't be alarmed- its just me.

let's hug.

Bulimic Blogger

I've decided I'm a bulimic blogger. I can post and post in one day, and then will rid myself of blogging for the following days. Do you get it? Binge and purge?...

I have so many things to write about. Nothing of great signifigance...but things to write nonetheless. This is what I have to say right now.

I just went to Kneaders for lunch and got a kids meal. Its comes with a ham and cheese sandwich, a sugar cookie and a drink. I just want to know why they would make a KIDS ham and cheese with 3 pounds of mayo on it. I was so mad. I had to take a napkin and wipe it off. It was like piles of mayo. Gross. And even after the wiping, it was still oozing. gag.

AND

You know how the end of your pen takes on that really rough shredded texture when you chew on it too much- thats how the plastic straw in my kids size drink felt. So I only took two sips- I couldnt take it. Cuz i knew IIIIIIIIII hadn't been chewing on it- so why did it have to have that texture!?!??!!??!?

But at least there was a deck of Animal Trivia cards in my kids meal. WOO....HOOOO!!! Here are just a FEW of the questions. (i really did love this. i love random stuff like this)

1. How far can a rat fall without being injured?
A. 100 feet
B. 60 feet
C. 10 feet
D. 7 feet

2. Which insect lays its eggs under the skin of a caterpillar?
A. Wasp
B. Grasshopper
C. Butterfly
D. Dung beetle

3. Where are two-horned rhinos from?
A. Europe
B. India
C. Africa
D. Rhinos only have one horn.

4. A giant squid's eyes can get to be as large as:
A. Basketballs
B. Softballs
C. Tennis balls
D. Golf balls

5. How many hours will the average sloth spend sleeping in one week?
A. 52 hours
B. 87 hours
C. 129 hours
D. 167 hours


And here is a word scramble from the bag my food came in. Unscramble the letters to reveal the secret food item.

1. RATCRO
2. SHECEE
3. MOOTAT
4. ICOBCORL
5. CNABO


Animal Trivia answers:

1. B. 60 feet - a rat can fall from a 5-story building (about 60 feet) without injury.
2. A. Wasp - a wasp lays its eggs under the skin of a caterpillar so that its young can eat the caterpillar's inards as they grow.
3. B. India - Rhinos with two horns are from India. Rhinos with one horn are from Africa.
4. A. Basketballs - The giant squid has the largest eyes in the world, measuring in at about 9.39 inches(24cm).
5. C. 129 hours - During one week, the average slot will spend 129 hours asleep, 18 hours climbing, 11 hrs feeding, and 10 hrs awake but motionless.


Word scramble answers:

1. Carrot
2. Cheese
3. Tomato
4. Broccoli
5. Bacon

Ok- after really thinking about it- Im SO tired of the music on my ipod. I'm having a hard time finding that 'right' song to listen to right now. Nothing's hitting the spot. In all honesty, I think Brit may have made me lose my music appetite for the moment.

okay! so what!!?!? I still AM listening to Britney. Some of her lyrics just 'speak' to me.

FINE!! I ADMIT IT!!! I WAS just listening to Britney Spears on my ipod!

stop judging me.

Fashion Help

We have just been informed that the Executive Director from AT&T will be visiting the office next week. We received an email saying, and I quote: "We need to leave him with the best impression possible. We are requesting that you come dressed according to CVG “Business Casual” guidelines.

Specifically, no shorts, t-shirts, no flip-flops, no blue jeans.

Men -- please wear slacks and a collared shirt.
Women -- please wear slacks, skirts or a nice dress."

Unquote.

So I'm really in a bind, because for those of you who know me- the do-not-wear-these-or-you-will-be-canned portion of the list is who I am! If only my closet were full of the following sweaters I'd have no problems.


Golden Fireworks Freedom

Courtyard Blues

Devil's Blood

Sald of Greens

Lotion of Ocean

I seriously think I will go on a hunt for my own "Lotion of Ocean" this weekend. What would happen if I came to work dressed in a sweater like this. Would people really think that I thought I looked nice? Would I be shunned? Would I be sent home to change?

The possibilites are endless.

TAG TEAM BACK AGAIN...

Not THEEEESE guys.....THESE guys!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


So on my way home from work today Whoomp There It Is was playing on the radio!!! ARE YOU EVEN KIDDING!?!?!! I was so SHOCKED and EXCITED that I almost swerved into oncoming traffic!!! I haven't heard that song in YEAARS!!!

But if you think I didn't remember every word by heart-then you are craaazay!

Whenever I hear that song I remember when I was like 11 or 12, I went to a high school football game in Marsh Valley (it's like 20 mins south of Pocatello) and after we made a touch down, the crowd of high school kids from good old Preston High started chanting Whoomp There It is! And I thought it was SOO COOL!!! High Schoolers Rule. So on our next trip to Logan (Logan,Ut was the closest city to Preston) - I bought the single (on tape of course). Well, I thought that it was really rebellious of me to be listening to Tag Team so I bought a Mariah Carey single as well. So when my mom asked what I bought, I told her Mariah Carey. (Sorry mom for being a liar and a sneak) And I was so nervous about it that when I listened to it when my family was home I would turn the volume down realllly low so no one would hear my, heaven forbid, hip hop music. But then when no one was home I'd blare it! Isn't that so dumb of me. Oh well. I was young- throw me a bone.

Anyway - It was great hearing it again today- I was in my own little heaven - and I even busted out some old moves while driving down State Street. It brought back some great (nerdy) memories.

........party on party people let me hear some noise, DCs in the house jump jump rejoice........

I just think she's classy

Gym gym GYM GYM gym

So I need to go to the gym. And I have really been giving myself lots of pep talks lately and getting myself psyched to go. (you may note that i have to do a lot of convincing and guilt tripping to myself before i'll actually get up the gusto to GO to the gym. it hasn't really worked in the past. we'll see how it pans out this time.) I was reading a friends blog today and found this hilarious thing he said and thought it was perfectly said.

Cardio is hell. You know that feeling in your ribs when it hurts to breath after running full speed for more than 3 seconds? That’s Satan.

And that my friends, is why I do not go to the gym. It's not because I'm lazy- its because I CTR, and avoid Satan at all costs.

My battle with cocaine

Part 1.

My first transfer on my mission we lived in an ooooold creepy GHETTO used-to-be-school that was converted into apartements. Across the hall from us lived a man named No Pants. (Well his real name is Danny, but we called him No Pants for certain reasons.) No Pants recycled cans for a living. He would get up EARLY in the morning and could be heard in the hall jiggling his cans around, sorting them, crushing them..whatever it was he did. Well one night my companion and I got home and we happened upon No Pants in the hall and he was hiiiiiigh as a kite. We asked him what was up and he animately told us how the neighbors upstairs had SNUCK into his apt while he was IN THE SHOWER and they had put COCAINE in his milk. Yada yada yada, he drank the milk, and now he is VERY upset that they would break in and do such a thing.

*Here I am thinking, yeah, sure No Pants. I'm totally sure our poor ghetto white trash neighbors REALLY wasted their precious drugs on you. Get a grip* My companion on the other hand was outraged. "You need to call the cops!" "They can't just go breaking into people's apartments,putting drugs in their milk!" Bless her clueless heart. We eventually made it safely into our apartment and away from his craziness.

Crisis averted. Victory #1.

Part 2.

Today while in the bathroom at work I noticed in the toilet paper holder there was a small pile of drugs. Why would there be cocaine in the Kimberly Clark toilet paper holder, I thought to myself. Something seems aloof. So I decided I better take matters into my own hands. I bravely grabbed a little pinch with my fingers and determined by the texture and smell that it was in fact just toilet papers shavings.

Once again I am victorious.
Andrea - 2.
Drugs...zero.

The first 2 pics are my quilt that I'm working on- its just a bunch of squares of fabric by Amy Butler. I bought the fabric over a year ago- I really need to finish it. I just need to get fabric for the back.

The next pictures are the center for a table runner quilt thing that I'm making- I'm going to a quilting class, and that is our first project. I still have 2 more classes and so I still have alot of work left on it.

The last 2 pics are my apron! Cute huh? Well it needs to be ironed, but its still cute. (I was trying to take a picture of it laid out on the table, but it wasn't working- so Brad modeled it for me so i get a decent picture of it. what a good husband)

CAN I GET A WITNESS?!?

How does everyone feel about me leaving work early today. I personally feel great about it.

My Someday Aprons

K Dont laugh at my seriously lacking Paint skills- but here's a couple aprons I drew up that I want to try to make. Cute right?!?!!!? The 3 wavy lines on the bottom half of the white apron are 3 different layers. (I'll have to take a pic of the half apron I made a few weeks ago that has 3 different layers, so you can see what I mean.) Anywho. If I ever make them and they turn out slightly decent I'll post pictures. But for now- we can only look at my drawing and dream.

AMY IS ENGAGED!!!

Okay so here is my FIFTH post for the day. My little sister Amy got engaged tonight!!! I'm so happy for her. I think I screamed for nearly 10 mins straight when she told me I was so excited!!! I even kept screaming when I got OFF the phone with her. (My neighbors dog was going crazy)

Amy is a nanny in Virginia and met Sam through a mutual friend. What's sad is I haven't met Sam yet but my mom and older sister Anneke have and they approve, so I suppose I do as well. But I'm excited to meet him and I'm sure I'll love him (if not Amy's gonna send him packin!) Anyway CONGRATULATIONS AMY! I love you sooo much and Im glad you're so happy and I wish I was there to give you a big hug! (i chose red font for looooove)

The Way I Are

I'm THAT person that:

- Totally can't stop myself from dancing wherever I might be when I hear music I like.
- Sings outloud in my cubicle at work.
- Puts the Quattro Runner(4Runner..for those of you that don't habla espanol) in 4wheel drive when it's raining cuz Im so paranoid of hydroplaning, but then swerves to drive through big puddles on the side of the road.
- Jumps in puddles but then complains that my feet are wet.
- Watches too much CSI and then stays up all night because I'm scared.
- Still loves things such as Full House, Saved by the Bell, NKOTB, Milli Vanilli, Kris Kross and Vanilla Ice.
- Loves my friends but never keeps in touch.
- Listens to songs I like on repeat until I can't possibly stand to listen to them one more time.
- Will go weeks between posting on my blog but then gets really mad that other people don't update theirs!
- Laughs when people fall. (I have a REALLLLLY hilarious story about my friends grandma rolling backwards down the 3 steps into the boys locker room in her wheelchair during our band concert in high school- if you ever need a good laugh)
- Checks behind the shower curtain, in every closet, and every space that's too small to even fit a 3 year old when I get home to make sure noone is hiding in my house.
- Will drive with my windows down and my heater on in the winter.
- Won't let myself walk down the pen/marker aisle in stores because I'm too obsessed and will want to buy them all. (im seriously in love with fine point sharpies and have every color)
- Doodles on everything and writes my name over and over.
- Cant carry a plastic bag around too long cuz I'll have it twisted and torn apart in minutes.


I think that's about all for now, I gotta go to the bathroom.

Rainy Day

I got SOAKED going to my car after work in the rain today!!! But I guess noone MAAAAADE me jump in those puddles.

Sorry boyfriend...

But your hair looks like my little sisters - and she's a girl - and her hair is girly(see pic above). Maybe try looking like your own gender.

Seriously Sir

You sound like you are about to hack up your lungs, which will come hurling onto my keyboard, and then I will have to yell at you, and youre sick so I dont want to have to do that. So please, do us both a dang favor, and go home. Its called a 'Sick Day'. Try it out.

Im a Thief

OKAY OKAY! I stole this picture off of Melissa's blog, cuz I just HAD to have it! It is thee funniest cutest thing ever!!! This is why I love Jaman so much- cuz he is just hilarious!

It was raining the other day and he wanted to go outside, so he found and empty box and put it on his head. I love it because you know he's not doing it to be goofy or anything. It just seems so normal for him to put a box on his head to protect him from the elements, like its a hat or an umbrella or something. And I love that he's SO oblivious to the fact that they took a picture of him. ...."I'm just standing in the rain with a box on my head and this is sooo normal."


And may I just say while I'm at it, how much I love Curry and Melissa. They are so amazing. They adopted Jaman from Ghana a year ago and have already made the biggest difference in this 8 year old's life. For those of you who don't know, Curry has a non profit organization- Signs of Hope International- that takes interns to Ghana to teach sign language in deaf schools, and that helps raise money so that more deaf children can even GO to school. Jaman was a student in one of the schools and Curry and Melissa met him while they were over there and knew they should adopt him. They have been AMAZING with him. He has learned so much from them and they've just given him all their love. I love knowing Jaman, he makes me so happy. He LOVES pizza and can often be seen signing 'pizza' to his imaginary friends. He also LOVES to talk on the phone and it is thee FUNNIEST thing ever! "Buh buh buh buh buh buh buh - oy yoy yoy yoy yoy" is a normal conversation to have on the phone with him.

They now have a foster child, 5 year old Elizabeth, living with them who is also deaf and she is the cutest little sweet thing! If you could all just see how good and loving they are with her you would you understand how great they are.

I love that they are taking the time with these kids to give them the love they deserve and need. And to help teach them and do whatever they can for them. They are the greatest friends and I love them TONS!!!!!!!!!